Our household is preparing itself for the upcoming storm season. The Gold Coast in Queensland, Australia, is prone to massive summer storms, and current conditions indicate a dangerous bushfire risk. The world's weather is going haywire, as you've seen in Europe, Tibet and Southeast Asia.
The local Council has a very good level of readiness, response and advice should such events occur. Here's their site: https://www.goldcoast.qld.gov.au/Services/Emergencies-disasters-outages/Get-Ready
No...
I receive loads of exciting emails. Warnings, pleading, bleating, and greetings. I manage to avoid nearly all of them. It turns out I'm not off to Hollywood, but staying here in my room. This email threatens my well-being, and no, I'll not be opening the attachment, thanks very much.
๐ถ๐พ ๐๐บ๐๐พ ๐๐พ๐ผ๐พ๐๐๐พ๐ฝ ๐๐พ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐บ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ฏ๐บ๐๐พ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐พ๐๐๐๐๐๐บ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐พ๐บ๐ฝ๐๐๐ ๐ผ๐๐๐๐พ๐๐ ๐บ๐๐ฝ ๐๐๐ฟ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐พ ๐๐๐๐พ๐ ๐ ๐พ๐ผ๐๐๐บ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐พ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ฟ ๐๐๐๐๐ฝ ๐๐บ๐๐๐๐พ๐.
๐ฏ๐ ๐พ๐บ๐๐พ ๐๐พ๐๐๐พ๐!
๐ฎ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐พ๐ ๐๐บ๐ ๐ฝ๐พ๐๐พ๐ผ๐๐พ๐ฝ ๐๐๐บ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ฅ๐บ๐ผ๐พ๐ป๐๐๐...
Here is the review:
If you enjoy dark, cynical, unapologetic humour, this collection is likely to suit you.
Told through the voice of a retired Environmental Health Officer with a lifetime of grievances, these interconnected stories take sharp, often hilarious aim at bureaucracy, hypocrisy, and everyday human stupidity. Outlaw motorcycle clubs, eccentric religious figures, reluctant food operators, and even murder all feature, and just when a story seems predictable, Crawford steers it...
A few people have asked what sort of music I like, what I do not, etc. I used to say any music that has heart, brains and balls. All three, no matter what genre, although it would be unlikely to be hard-slang country. So, as I love lists, I'm going to create a list. It will grow as I remember those I've forgotten and rudely left off. It's in no particular order or country of origin. I have all my music on my phone and refuse to support that evil Spotify. I tried it but didn't like the choices...
As I've mentioned before, I'm very lucky to receive a large number of emails inviting me to do all sorts of things. This one is a beauty. The actual head of Amazon MGM Studios approached me directly. Amazing, I hear you sneer. Yes, it is amazing. Here's the proof ;) So now I'm off to Hollywood.
Dear Alan Crawford, I hope youโre having a great week. Iโm reaching out regarding your book, A Story or Two to Tell.
The collectionโs blend of dark humour, interconnected stories, eccentric characters,...
Howdy all, it's very relaxing sitting here thinking of content for this blog. So relaxing because nothing really happens around here. It's a quiet place, best described as quiet. I decided to try and update my profile image, so we leapt into the backyard and tried a few. This one is the least offensive. A triple chin, facial outbreaks, with a cute dimple.
The marketing for A Story or Two to Tell and More Stories to Tell is about to be boosted, and I look forward to seeing exciting results,...
This delightful approach arrived in my inbox today. I think it's an AI-assisted review-style compliment, and I know it's designed to have me pay them for a service or two. Sadly, no, I'm all out of money for such things, but I've taken the liberty of copying the main part and posting here.
I'm simply glowing and pleased as punch :)
Dear Alan,
Some storytellers smooth the rough edges from their characters. Yours seems to have done the opposite, and that may be precisely what makes the voice so...
I'm trying to counteract the impact of getting old. I did a post about my new home gym (on its way soon), and that physical activity will do me the world of good. I've also got to reduce the size of my belly.
A generous shape that is more often than not labelled as a beer belly. Not in my case though. Over the years I've tried everything, in moderation: no carbohydrates, meal replacement shakes, no sweets, etc. All to no avail.
I walk one of our puppies 3.5 kms every morning and about 2 km in...
I sit here watching far too much news for my own well-being. But I can't bring myself to be political here in the Stories to Tell Collection marketing space, so I'll keep it free of such observations and views.
What I will try to do is try to share some random clips, interesting history, maths, science, music and laughs. Maybe even a cat video or babies doing funny things. If, like me, you've spent time on the internet, you'll appreciate just how many videos there are.
I'll start with the...
Well, after spending money on gym fees and not attending as often as I should, I've made the wild decision to buy a home gym. A Revolution HG636S will be delivered and installed in my garage by some beefy folks. My wife and I will be able to use this machine as often as we can without drama.
We're not looking to add huge muscle mass, just trying to outweigh (pun intended) the loss of same as we get more mature. Well, she is. Not me. This video shows two extra features added; ours will be as...
I have taken on board advice about my old website, alancrawford.com.au, that it was causing some SEO and reader confusion. I redirected it here, but yesterday I undid that redirect and changed the site to reflect slightly different content. I removed my remaining short story bits, but I've left the very old tbaoo.com posts as that site is offline. tbaoo.com contained my first attempts at writing, combined with some newer rants about my local Council. I hope this adjustment will be clear when...
What a frustrating situation. I'm trying to learn about and maybe use A+ Content for my descriptions, etc. I'd completely forgotten that I set up some sort of individual seller account, and it was active across many markets. Somehow, without any activity, the UK one has violated something? And it is suspended. Because of this, I can't access A+ Content. So the answer is the snake eating its tail.
Log into the account that I did not know of, then tried and found that I had done such a thing....
The worldwide weather is reacting to global warming; Tibet, Nepal, Europe's fires, and the impact El Niรฑo will have on Australia are explained here: https://www.bom.gov.au/news-and-media/el-nino-what-it-means-for-australias-climate
Please be safe, be prepared, and where you can, help those in power to make the right decisions; ignoring climate change is a no-win situation.
Maybe also try some serious distraction from current events if you can. Yes, the Stories to Tell Collection helps do that...
Every day I receive at least 10 emails offering marketing services, videos, banners, Amazon techniques, etc. The latest is fake literary agents and publishers' "cold calling" seeking to talk with me about my work. Using Gmail is a bit of a giveaway ;)
Anywho, I resist these generous approaches and reply with the following:
Thank you for your interest in the Stories to Tell Collection.
I really appreciate it, but with the overwhelming number of requests and the fact that I've no money for...
The response to my starting a blog has been amazing! In fact, I've received no response at all. It's a serious hill to climb of course, and if you see the blog, please react and help me to relax. I'll start adding some photos to distract you from the lack of content.
It will probably get very silly. I've not run an active blog for some years. I started online with tbaoo.com, which morphed into alancrawford.com.au as I started writing longer posts and stories. I am thinking of collating some more stories and posts into a new ebook. I'm also being coerced into writing a completely different long-form story. That's going to be difficult.
Welcome to the new blog feature.
I'll aim to offer some scintillating ideas, random thoughts, hints at new stories and maybe even a reaction or two. If you'd like to sign up for any exciting emails, you'll receive a PDF of my fanciful resume. I'd also love some feedback, good or bad ;), should you have any. You can reach me via the Contact section.